Family Business(2003–2006)

TortASS and the Hare

Cousin Stevie joins Adam in this 4th season opener (which was filmed last summer) in recruiting ladies for the "Radio Olympics". Meanwhile, Stevie and his wife Amy have a new addition to the family, an exotic dog.

Birds and Beehinds

The day had to come! Brady is asking about sex and who better than dad, one of the most responsible and popular adult business entrapreneurs, to explain it. Cousin Stevie is giving a moment to moment, blow by blow of roller derby as only can be seen on a series like this!

A Derriere to Remember

Adam has a housewarming and Mirna plans it with Stevie. Lila shops for a new car during her late mid-life crises.

Taint Maarten

Stevie remarried his wife of many years in a Vegas wedding featured last season. Now it's time for the 2nd honeymoon to go with that wedding and what better place for an adult-business entrepreneur, but the string bikini, topless party island of St. Maarten?

Buttocks & Bagels

Stevie is off to NY while Adam struggles and stresses to launch his new party bus business.

Buns & Ammo

Adam and Mirna attend a swingers convention, complete with new adult toys and unbelievable items we're still awaiting word on (what are they?) Stevie launches his own adult oriented 'support our troops' line.

Tush Comes to Shove

Last season we met Adam's brother and tonight, Adam's sister proves to be one of the 'village' that's raising the child (Brady). Stevie makes an ill advised trip to Seattle and Lila makes perhaps an even more ill advised trip to a gun range.

Nothing Butt the Truth

Adam is never better than when he's eloquently and intelligently defending the right to free speech. This isn't just to further his own agenda in the adult entertainment business, but he seems sincerely dedicated to the cause overall. Better yet, he's not advocating free speech as an excuse to behave badly, illegally or immorally. Stevie strives to drive up membership for the Free Speech Coalition.

Clip Show

4th Season clip show, billed as 'new'

JewASS New Year

Lila (Seymore/Adam's mom) prepares for Rosh Hashana and the entire family is expected to arrive. Adam reveals the secret he has been keeping of his new relationship with his ex-assistant Mirna (or does he?). Is Mirna the porn star, the girl that Mom has been hoping for ?

The ApprentASS

Now that Mirna is dedicating herself to the business full time, Adam needs a new assistant. Bishop and Lila begin the interview process, but the final three are put to the test by Adam.

ASS and You Will Receive

Adam's and Mirna's relationship has gone on long enough to hit that phase of needing to talk. Imagine that? They are working on maintaining their relationship by keeping the lines of communication open and outlining what is important to each of them.

Time Is Of The ASSence

All in the FAMILY ! Brady's got a school play, Lila saves the day, dad's on the way. Adam's in a movie and it's not his! Victim or Slasher or ? And it's ""Seymore's"" part that's got a real casting call.

Mid-Life CrisASS

Adam's turning 40! He's also visiting a psychic, having a party and like everyone else heading down the other side of the mountain, thinking about taking a dive off a bridge.

Up and CUMming

Adam's male performers are having trouble living UP to expectations, so it's time for new talent. However, unlike the girls, the guys can't just ""pretend"" to be uhh, stand up guys, so the search is on for the next male porn star. Meanwhile, Stevie finds a new (potential) actress for his ""Pussy Party"" series. Is he really so bold (or so naive?) in having her move in with him AND his wife?

Falling On Your ASS

Father - Son - Father - Son. Adam wants to please Brady with a snowboarding trip, but he (Adam) is somewhat afraid of skiing! Still, it's for Brady's birthday, so Adam looks for support, finding an experienced skiier.... his own Dad.

COCKtoberfest

Lila is again apparently the ""village"" it takes to raise a child as she stays with Brady while Adam is off. He's in Chicago to take care of the Family Business in the area he always excels at - the press and public speaking. Cousin Stevie and Bishop are lost and in trouble...in Berlin!

BroadcASS

Stevie wants to have his own radio show so Adam pulls some strings to get him a one-time audition spot on Playboy Radio. It wouldn't be Stevie if there wasn't a hitch, like guests don't show up (or storm out). Adam ?

FameASS

Season 2 premiere - finally! Adam is dating from that internet dating site again. This one enters into it already having seen the entire first season of the show, but nonetheless playing absurdly ignorant of what he actually does! Stevie is convinced to take acting classes, which are a stereotype of all sit-com exaggerations of acting classes. After making it through the first one without exploding in expletives or walking out (or both), he actually returns for more! Lila is prim and proper with her plate of baked goodies as she pursues a publisher for her cookbook and tries to win them over with samples. If she could only NOT mention what the family business is. A terrific start to a 2nd season!

In SicknASS and in health

New ASSpirations

Adam's assistant continues to pursue her new career IN the action rather than just in the office and of course, Adam is there to help. Meanwhile, mom gets Adam involved in ""speed dating"", so surely there's lots more comedy in store for this series, aside from the ongoing antics of everyone's favorite stooge, cousin Stevie. Interesting clips include a club 'poll dancer'/stripper giving serious lessons.

Topless in Tampa

There's another porn convention, this time in Tampa, Florida. Is there really a need to say more about this episode? Oh, except that cousin Stevie is trying to redeem himself (again) by handling things back in California. Only thing is, no one and nothing seems to be cooperating. Of course.

Spunk'd

Bishop is the star and retaliatory victim of a practical joke everyone takes part in, while readying another movie.

The Breast Is Yet to Come

Seymore's (Adam's) assistant/secretary isn't out of the picture yet. Or IN the pictures either. She insists on implants, despite the best attempts by both Adam and Stevie to convince her she doesn't need them.

ASS Good as It Gets

Who better than Adam to teach a class on adult film making? Obviously Bishop thinks he's learned enough and attempts to develop his own adult film line. Meanwhile, cousin Stevie visits his doctor and makes some promises we all wonder if he can keep.

Chicago, IllinASS

Telethon for free speech! There are places that Adam cannot mail his movies to - or face serious jail time for pornography. Each state has its own definitions, most of them being, ""...you know it when you see it"". So, what's considered 'art' in CA is 'garbage' in that other state and 'dangerous' in ?????? As usual, Adam Glasser is well spoken about this. Lots of fun, lots of flashing for a pretty serious debate.

Raising AwarenASS

Adam is partying, the family is handling business crises. Yeah, same story, but it's a new episode, really!

Personal Ads

Seymore Butts (Adam Glaser) might make a living filming, sometimes performing in, directing/producing and distributing graphic, xxx rated videos, but true love is just as elusive for him as anyone else. Adam actually posted a personal ad on an internet dating site and this episode focuses on his resulting dates. From what I gather, the ad is still on the site. From what I know, Adam is still quite single. Much to the dismay of his mom, who wants little more for her son than to see him happily in a relationship with a nice girl. Mom, by the way, manages the ""Family Business"".

Reunion

It's been 20 years since high school. Follow Adam Glasser (""Seymore Butts"") to his reunion and listen in on conversations with former classmates' reactions to his business, his life and his philosophy. Sometimes the loudest reactions are in the body language or how a voice changes. The whispers, looks and nervous smiles. The absence of a smile. The judgements. Class reunions are difficult enough. Adam Glasser's is worth going to, even if you won't go to your own!

Casa De Butts

Adam Glasser's mom, Lila, meets her new neighbor. While having lunch, the neighbor asks if Lila works. After a bit of stuttering for the right words, she admits she's a part of her son's business (she's the bookkeeper) and she has to explain what it is (Lila is nothing if not honest). More insights to the ""family"" behind this Family Business and even more humanity. Lila is very proud of the man her son is and can't (won't) hide it. However, as she laments, ""I'll bet Spielberg's mom doesn't get the same reaction"".

Sex Toys

How do you interview women for the job of porn star? How do you screen test them? In this episode, you'll find out. One hopeful is asked by Adam/Seymore, ""So, what's the best line of this business?"", she replies, ""The hours!"" Cousin Stevie is featured in all his charming, inept glory as he tries to give a friend a break by letting him sketch prototypes for sex toys. If only the guy could draw! Follow the family as they run their own 'departments' of this family business - and as Adam tries to expand it into the adult 'toy' realm. Between the girls' auditions (faking it is as natural to these women as wearing heels, implants and liposuction) and Stevie describing the ""not too deep love donut"" (for men) while admitting he needs one in reverse - this episode is just plain fun!

Strictly BiznASS

Oh woe, the business of naked people and sex-sex-sex can be so stressful! In this episode, the most graphic and disturbing scenes are at the poker table.

Seymore's Other ASSets

ASSistant

Las VegASS

I Want to Be an Adult Film Star